Probiotics, essential oils and anxiety

As some of you may have read in a previous post, here I have been battling anxiety for awhile but it had gotten really bad over in the last year or so. I finally talked to my doctor about it and she perscribed me on two meds, Zoloft and Prozac, separately of course . Both gave me awful side effects even after trying them for a couple weeks each so I stopped taking them. I was desperate to find something else that would help. My friend Trisha on FB commented to me a few times that essential oils are amazing and that they will help with it and a lot of other things, blah, blah, blah (thats what I read then, ha!). Essential oils are the big trend right now and I was not jumping on that bandwagon. I don't know what it was she sent me that made me really take notice but something did and the fact I was desperate to find something that would help battle it probably helped. So I looked into it. Albert, being the vegan and SUPER "clean" and also very against me taking meds, gave me a few studies to read/watch. Of course diet is a big one a but also probiotics, essential oils and massage. I haven't convinced him to let me frequently get massages but I was interested in that the studies he was having me read were also mentioning oils. So I asked Trisha to give more info on these oils as I also asked around and did a little more research. To try them I'd have to buy a "starter kit" that included a diffuser and oils. I wasn't ready to put out the money for something that I wasn't even sure would do me any good so I thought about it awhile more.

I finally decided to take the plunge and order one. People that use them swear by them and there are SO many other ways to use the oils I figured that if it didn't help with my anxiety I'd use it for something else. Well, I am here to say I am glad I did. I am not "swearing" by them yet but I'm starting to believe. The main thing I have really noticed is the peppermint oil that comes in the kit has helped calm my stomach. At work the other day I started to get an upset stomach and remembered I had my oils with me so I rubbed some on my stomach and within about 5-10 the stomach ache was gone! Maybe a coincidence but maybe not, regardless I felt better and thats all that mattered. The morning before my first time volunteering in Antonio's class I put some of the Peace and Calming oil blend in the diffuser and "put on" some other oils and went in. I had some anxiety but not nearly like I thought I would. Wow! I was impressed. Again, I'm not completely sold yet but it seems to be helping. I don't expect anything to get rid of my anxieties I just want them lessened and so far the oils have helped. There's a liquid Xanax blend (I am not kidding!) of oils that I am looking forward to trying. I just ordered a couple of the oils that didn't come with my kit that I need for it and can't wait to try it out. There are so many things they say oils can help with so I am looking forward to putting them to the test. Now I just have to get in the mindset to try the oils before meds!

Also, I got some probiotics and have been taking them for just over a week. They also seem to have helped. So far the main thing I have noticed is my morning coffee doesn't give me a stomach ache like it so often did before. A lot of the studies say the stomach is your second brain and a happy tummy makes a happy brain. The probiotics are very inexpensive compared to the oils so I did not hesitate on those. My friend Christina said she had been taking them, then stopped and within a short time could negativly feel the difference. I've had stomach issues my whole life that have only gotten worse with age and in the past week my tummy has generally been very calm and happy. :)

So far I'd say both the oils and probiotics have helped. It's only been about a week using both but so far I have noticed a positive difference which I'm impressed with. Thank you both Trisha and Christina for the suggestions and help. For those of you who care, I will try to write another update in a few weeks with how its all working, or not working. :) I'm praying that it does work and I'm not just in some sort of "honeymoon" phase with it. I would highly recommend the probiotics to anyone and the oils as well, especially if you want to naturally medicate yourself without medication. If you're at all interested I can tell you which probiotics I have (there are tons of different kinds). If you want to try to oils, let me know because if you mention my name (if/when you order a starter kit) I can get a $50 "credit" from the company! :) YAY!

Until then, keep the praying and positive thoughts going, I am sure that has helped too!

first race

Today was my first actual "race"; The Biggest Loser Run/Walk 5k. There wasn't nearly as much "pomp" as I thought there would be. Which in some ways, was disappointing but oh well. The race itself, was fun. There was also a half marathon. There were some "serious" runners that were going to run the whole thing and appeared to have been running for a long time. There were also some who, clearly were not, and hadn't been running long. I actually saw a runner toting a Mc Donalds bag while eating an egg mc muffin, or something similar. I felt badly for them knowing it was probably not going to settle well once they started running.

Some people had pictures of themselves ( much heavier self) pinned to their shirts to remind themselves how far they had come. Some were pretty impressive. Some people appeared to have a lot more to go, yet there they were, getting ready to run (or walk) a 5k and some, even a half marathon. Props to them because I have no intentions of running a half marathon. The half marathoners went first, then it was our turn. There were SO many of us. And such a wide variety, big and small, old and young. Some in running attire, some in jeans and tennis shoes. Just when you thought they were going to be a spectator you'd see their bib. So different from the races Albert runs.

 This is the crowd that had to go before me, what you don't see is that it also goes around the corner!

I had to wait about 7 minutes after the 5k started before it was my turn to go. They let about 100 of us at a time go every 30sec.  When I realized how long the line really was I wished I had gone and stood in line prior. There were still a bunch behind me as well. By this point I was ansy to start, however I was not nervous or anxious at all, which I was very grateful for.

Finally my turn and I was in the front!

The air horn sounded and I was off. I "darted" off in front of the pack along with about 5 others (while leaving the rest in the dust. lol), then all of a sudden we caught up to the previous group who were walking. There were a lot of them and it was like a traffic jam of people. A handful of us ran zig, zagging through the group until we reached the next group which, by then had thinned out. It was kinda empowering running past all the walkers/slower than me joggers. 

Then I'd see a very overweight person walking and feel overcome by emotion. So much pride (for them) and I was so proud (of them). I knew how hard it was to get out there some days, and how much harder it was before I had lost some weight. On top of that, if I were their size or even half their size I would never have had the guts to do it.  I so badly want to cheer them on as i passed them but the lump in my throat stopped me. They were actively trying to get healthy and it was hard work, both emotionally and physically. 

There was one water station and Jackson from season 14 (of the biggest loser) was there. Since I had regretted not getting a picture with him at the expo I stopped and took a selfie with him, he wished me good luck and I the continued on. In the brief 5 sec, he was so nice and I felt so silly. :) 

selfie with Jackson

After my selfie, I had about a block to go before we were to make a u-turn and head back to the finish. At one point I had to stop and walk but then I felt a group of people coming up behind me while I was walking in the middle of the road. I glanced behind me and sure enough there were, which made me want to start running again. Every time I felt them creep up on me I pushed harder, they, without knowing, were great motivation. Finally, I could see and hear the finish line, finally! Then I saw Albert and Antonio waving at me about a 100 yards from the finish; I had done it! Phew! I ran 98% of the way, better than I normally do! It felt good. As some of you know. I had been feeling sick for pretty much all of September and only ran 3 times that month. I was in no way ready for this. In the 2 runs prior to this race I had been slow, much slower than usual. But I knew I could walk the whole way and still not come close to being last so I was determined to do it regardless! So I was so proud of myself for running pretty much the whole thing and feeling good! Turns out I did do good, I ended up placing 5th for women in the age group 35-39!! And 110th overall for age groups.  Happily, it also doesn't tell me how many of us were in that age group (or overall) so I can just assume there were hundreds! HA! :)

waving at Albert and Antonio at the end!  

It was a perfect morning for a run too; cloudy and 55 degrees. Maybe next year I can recruit my mom and cousins to walk/run with me! Now that I've gotten my first race under my belt I might now want to do another 5k. We shall see.

Finished and I got my medal! :)

Getting "crunchy"

I'm (we're) getting a little crunchy here. At least thats what it seems. I have always seemed to be more on the, "if it happens to be good for the environment, then great" or "if it's healthy or organic, its only  by chance" side of things. I've always cared but not as much as I should.

Then Albert had to go and start running, which turned into him wanting to eat better, which turned him into becoming vegan. (Don't get me wrong, I am incredibly proud of him and how healthy he's become. He's the main reason I started running and have become a healthy eater as well.) Then I realized dairy products negatively effected me so I cut out dairy. Then we started getting weekly organic food deliveries from Klesick Family Farm (which we love). 

Now, after trying to combat my anxiety (which has become pretty intense over the past year) with 2 different prescription drugs and facing severe side effects with each, I've decided to look for an alternative way(s) to calm my anxiety. I don't expect to rid myself of anxiety but if I could just cut down my anxieties to half, I'd be thrilled. I would love to be able to get in my car and go (anywhere) without feeling nauseous, sweaty, tense, light headed and feeling a rapid heartbeat. Even walking out to meet Antonio's bus I feel this way. The only, and I mean only, place/time I don't feel this way is at home. Once I am home and I'm almost always suddenly better. I don't go out and do things solely so I don't have to deal with feeling this way. :/

I have looked in to essential oils and will probably try them out. From what I've read, even if they don't help with my anxiety much there are other things I can use them for. Also, probiotics. There have been studies that have shown there is a direct link to the gut and the brain. If the gut is "happy" so is the brain. Again, if the probiotics don't directly help with my anxieties, they could help with the stomach issues I've had my whole life. Another thing I am going to try is yoga. Yeah, I am not sure if I'm coordinated enough to do it, but I am going to try. I'm just going to try some videos at home before I potentially embarrass myself at a class. Yoga is another thing that some people swear by; its supposed to be beneficial is many ways so if it doesn't help with anxiety it is just another thing that will help me. 

Last but not least, is diet. What we eat can be directly be linked to how we feel, duh. We already eat so much healthier that we did 2 years ago, so in my opinion, there isn't much left to change. Albert would argue this however. He has (strongly) suggested to eat more like him, vegan. I could almost call myself a vegan but not completely. I rarely eat meat but when I have the option to I usually do. Maybe not always steak but chicken. We don't eat it at home but if we go out (which is rarely) I do and I am not sure I am ready to go that extreme. I still salivate over a nice juicy steak, just typing it is making me want one...

I digress. Anyways, the diet part of things will have to stay the same, for now because I am not ready to convert. One last thing I may do is see a counselor. I've heard from a few friends that they go and going is have been very helpful for their own reasons. If the oils, probiotics and yoga don't help, before I go back to prescriptions I will probably try the counselor route. In the meantime, please send positive, calming thoughts my way. And as always, prayers are always welcome. I just really want to go back to enjoying life outside my home with my amazing little family. Until then, I am going to try to focus and breath deeply. ;)

5K

Sunday I have my very first "race". It's The Biggest Loser Run/Walk 5k (and marathon/half marathon but I am obviously not doing that). Happily its titled as a run/walk because I am no way ready for it. I have been out of running for a month and not because I haven't wanted to but because I have felt awful, partly due to trials of 2 separate anxiety meds. Basically Albert has been a single parent for a month and has been awesome at it.

Regardless, my run is Sunday, yes this Sunday and I have only "run" (more like walked) a total of 3 times in the past month. Today's run/jog/walk was the longest, at just over 3 miles so I know I can at least make it that far. ;) Prior to this month I ran a 5k on pretty much every run I did so I wasn't to worried about this one. In fact, my plan was to train for this one to be my fastest 5k. Well, now it is more like just trying to finish it at my old, "normal", time. Sigh, so disappointed. For awhile I was worried I might not even be able to do it; I was so weak. But I am starting to feel better. My strength still isn't like it was but its closer.

This is partly why I've never done 5k races in the past, to much pressure. I like doing things in my own time, on my own way. I hate pressure, it gives me major anxiety, just ask my husband. I usually freak out or cave when up against a deadline/time/pressure. The Biggest Loser run should be fun and is definitely not a serious run in any way. Heck, the 5k has to be done at at least a pace of 30m/per mile; thats 30m to go one mile. I am pretty sure most could do that. Most races have a much faster required pace. So my goal is to run as much of it as possible and finish. Today's run was done in just over 40m so I should be able to do at least that; fingers crossed. It's supposed to be cold (high of 64) and rainy Sunday, so I am just hoping its dry enough for me to run and be done. I've run in 25 degrees before so temperature isn't to much of a concern, its the rain. I have no water repellent running gear because, well, I never run when it's raining...

So pray for me that I run it ok and that it stays dry. The race starts at 8:30 and I should be done before 9:30, so after 9:30 it can pour, just nor before please. :)